Burn the Binder: Why Incident Response is Broken (and How to Fix It)

Incident response is still run off a dusty PDF in a digital drawer—an artifact of 1980s disaster recovery logic pretending to govern 2025’s always-on, hyper-connected incident response chaos. The result is performative readiness: fragmented heroics, tribal knowledge, and rigid ticketing that reward neat reports over real outcomes. SIEM/SOAR/XDR promised autopilot; we got 18-month implementations and alert fatigue. Meanwhile, the plan you never use is the liability you’ll be judged against.

This talk calls the delusion by name and replaces it with a modern, dynamic program: modular, parallel playbooks embedded in real workflows; distributed ownership across Legal, Comms, HR, Security, Technology, and Business Leaders; automation that accelerates humans instead of replacing judgment; and immutable, contemporaneous records that stand up to regulators and courts. We’ll show how to train until response becomes muscle memory, tie communications to truth instead of spin, encode global privacy obligations into the flow, and prove ROI with time-to-detect/respond/contain metrics that actually move.

If it doesn’t work under pressure, it doesn’t work. Burn the binder. Let's build a program that leads through crisis, protects your reputation, and gets measurably faster every quarter.